Olympic Pirate Pentathalon

I've been watching the Olympics as I've been folding the 360 wedding invite wrappers this week. Here's an event I'd like to see.

I propose a new Olympic Event for 2012.

The Pirate Pentathalon

consisting of:
- swimming
- sailing
- pistol
- saber
- looting

Ok, so there's no Olympic looting event, I made that up, but the rest are real. I think I'm onto something. There should be some kinda of ad hoc N-tathalon for various obsolete occupations, who's modern adherents can compete in.

Maybe there should be a special meta-medal for medaling in the widest variety of sports.

I'm just saying is all....